You Must Haveth Thy Sense of Humor

“You Must Haveth Thy Sense of Humor”

I cherish my Sunday mornings because that is my soccer time. I can run like a maniac, breathe fresh air, compete, laugh, meditate, get-away and sweat, with very basic, simple intentions before me. I find soccer gives me a better workout than any other activity or exercise because I am forced to work my entire body and am constantly forced to run.
When I got back into playing soccer after college, I fell in with a group of Persians who had been playing together for years. At first it was a little hard to acclimate into their group because I was the lone American so I didn’t receive the same treatment as the other players did. I was fouled more often and yelled at constantly. I really had to prove myself as a player, much more so than the other new Persian players.
One of the interesting cultural factors of Persian athletes I have observed over the years, which is in sharp contrast to athletes from other countries, is the intensity and argumentative nature of the competition. When Persians compete, even if it is a kick-around at a local park among so-called friends, they treat it like the finals of the World Cup. There are constant arguments, battles, fisticuffs, intentional injuries, revenge, temper tantrums, screaming, crying, and so forth. When I have played with Americans, British, Germans, Asians, South Americans, Italians, Spanish, Mexicans, basically any other nationality, you have guys who want to win and play hard and sometimes fight and get angry, but not to the extent the Persians do. Persians love to win. Persians have to win. Even if there is nothing really at stake except pride. Americans want to win too, but there will be a point when an American will finally throw up his hands and proclaim, “You know what? It’s just a game and we ain’t getting paid so what the heck?”
A friendly kick-around at a park for Persians is all out war. Even the dude who is the nicest, friendliest chap before kick off, the person who seems like the most compassionate lover of humanity the modern world has ever known, with patience like a saint and monk-like restraint, will morph into the Demon King of Destruction on the field. And someone is always bound to get hurt. I have seen broken jaws, broken legs, broken ribs (I’ve done some of the breaking and had it done to me), broken arms, broken ankles and feet (I’ve had my foot broken too), broken noses (sorry, did this to someone too), heads cracked open, black eyes, fat lips, bloody noses, torn muscles, many, many destroyed knees, and numerous other injuries.
When a fight breaks out, as it always does, (I have been playing with this group for eleven years now and maybe have had three Sundays without at least one fight) I have to step back and laugh because the way I look at it is: I’m here for the fun of it. I’m here to get a little exercise. Laugh a little, sweat a little, connect with the land, my neighbors and fellow athletes and test my skills. Winning for me is great, but in the spirit of play, not in the spirit of harming someone else or making someone else feel bad. Granted, I have injured quite a number of persons in the course of different games but I am never compelled by malicious or vengeful motives. Not that I am more highly evolved or more intelligent or have greater sensibilities than anyone else, I am just happy to be outside, running around and appreciate every second of it. To get angry and fight really defeats the purpose.
I try to apply this to all areas of my life. It is very hard for me to become angry. Ever since my near-death experience, anger doesn’t seem to make much sense anymore. Anger and frustration are born out of thwarted desires. Not that I have beat desire completely, but it has cooled a bit, and I no longer need to have everything, be with everyone, smash things and be loud.
Often we take ourselves too seriously. To me, when someone is too serious about everything in their life, this is a sign of immaturity or ignorance. This is especially true when someone is older. I always feel sad for the older person, who has lived so many years only to reach a point where they are letting anger eat up their bodies and minds. It is anger that issues from stress and leads to more stress and more anger. We are angry because we are not getting what we want. We are angry that we lost a loved one or that someone cheated us or that God is challenging us. Smile and realize that it is all part of God’s perfect plan.